Preparation

When I say this journey started while watching an in-flight movie, I only mean the physical leg of the journey.  I was told six months prior to my deployment that I was going.  That gave adequate amounts of time to prepare and adequate amounts of time to just wish I could leave tomorrow so that I could be home that much sooner.  Kevin, my husband, and I spent much of our time talking about how we would smoothly transition the boys, ages thirteen months and three and a half years at the time of my departure, into me being gone.

I collected tips from coworkers who had previously deployed.  Kevin did infinite hours of research on-line to find activities and tips to help the boys.  Together, we developed an arsenal of resources to make sure the boys could remotely understand what was happening.  Each had a Mommy specific version of the book "Over There".  They had stuffed animals we made together with my voice inside saying, "I love you, I miss you, and I'll see you soon."  As time got closer to deployment, a chain was placed connecting all the bedrooms with a link for each day my orders stated I would be gone (plus a few more just in case). 

Kevin found programs to enroll the boys to give them something special to do while I was gone.  The post offered 16 hours of free daycare per child a month allowing him a break from being full-time Dad, as well as allowing him to do things with each child one on one.  Our date night sitter lived five minutes away and was scheduled to come at least once a month for a little respite for Kevin.  Our church poured out their support and people offered help to Kevin in such a beautiful and heart warming response.  We have no family close out here as the closest is half a country away.  Our military and church families just reached out to care for us when we needed it the most.

I have always been someone who wants to spend as much time as possible with my boys, but those months leading up to deployment, we did so many more special things as a family.  We took a family trip to the San Juan islands and spent a little more just to find a hotel with a pool.  My oldest loves to swim and my youngest got a first time experience.  We went to the zoo, the park, and just played at the house.  Who cared if dirty dishes were in the sink?  Those can be done later.  I only had so much time available to be with them.  We made cookies or cakes most weekends because my little guys loved wearing their "wrappers" to help in the kitchen and bedtimes were missed to watch an extra movie with Mom.  My youngest even got his entire bookshelf read to him one night before bed just to spend a little more time cuddling.  Kevin found Operation Love: Reunited (www.oplove.org) in the post's newsletter and we had pictures taken as a family so I could receive them down range some time during my deployment.  We ordered a few from there as well for the boys to have an individual picture with me in their rooms.  One was ordered for my husband to have a recent one of the two of us as well.  I made a cookbook for Kevin to have, since I do 90% of the cooking around the house.  They were easy recipes, but everyone has to start somewhere.

All the literature about deployment preparation suggests that each person has a goal for the deployment.  The service member can have a goal while gone as does the family.  I chose to get into better shape while away, and lose any remaining weight that might be lingering after having a couple kids.  Kevin wanted to become a little more proficient at cooking and to help us accomplish our goal as a couple: home ownership.  We really want to have the opportunity to own a home when we PCS to our next duty station.  Kevin has drafted a budget and is determined to make this happen.  We have a few houses we view as our goal and will see how close we can get to achieving this dream.